“Go to a Mormon
meeting on any given Sunday, and you’ll see three dudes sitting up by the
pulpit. The guy in the middle is the bishop, and he’s already spent most of the
day in meetings where he reviewed the ward’s staffing needs and organizing
relief efforts for families who may be struggling with health, financial, or
spiritual issues. He’s also been meeting one-on-one with members of the church
who look to him for counsel and support for personal problems that would turn
your hair white. Usually, he’s been doing all this since before the sun came
up, so don’t be surprised if he nods off while the meeting progresses.
Please keep in mind,
too, that there are no elections for bishops and stake presidents, nor are
there reelections. Each leader is “called” to serve, and they accept the
responsibility dutifully, no questions asked. They then serve for a period of
time, usually between five and ten years, after which they are “released,”
meaning they rejoin their congregations as lay members and have no more
responsibility than anyone else”
I’d like to add that these good men serve (as do most members of
the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints) without pay.
Last week, I helped my husband organize a small meeting
dedicated to the women who are the wives of these men. Not only do these men sacrifice much of
their personal lives in order to serve the Lord, their wives, by necessity,
have had their lives compromised as well.
They surrender a large part of their husband’s time to others while
their own families learn to manage without having him at home.
Phone calls in the middle of the night are not uncommon. On Sundays, Dad does not usually get to sit
with the family. A crisis in the
ward can interrupt family vacations. A child may see Dad have to leave in the middle of their
piano recital or a soccer game.
No, being part of a family where Dad is a member of a bishopric
is not without some sacrifice for every member. Some people criticize these men saying they have their
priorities wrong, but I think they are an example of commitment that their
children will, with a little help, learn to respect as an anomaly in our
society… a vanishing breed of men (and women) who know that sacrifice and
service must be taught by example.
In preparing for this special meeting, we wrote a poem that we
dedicated to the wives of these bishops.
We recognized that their contributions were just as important to the
work in Christ’s church as were their husband’s.
The Bishop’s Wife
I cannot see how this is right, I thought as I pulled my jacket tight.
We
barely have an evening free, when he can be alone with me.
How
can I give away that hour? It’s I who needs his priesthood power.
But smile I did and made a plan how I’d attempt
to help my man.
I knew that I should give a part of all I felt
within my heart.
At first, it did not seem too bad. My children
prayed, “please bless our Dad.”
I read a lot and hemmed a dress. I learned to
play my son at chess.
But loneliness became routine. I made all
decisions by myself, it seemed.
And when I needed time alone, my sister was the
one I phoned.
One night my sister came to stay, watching the
children for my ‘get-away.’
And though I could have fair escaped, I parked
outside the church front gate.
A ghost to see what’s in this place, I walked
dark halls just to see his face.
But then, instead…a man and wife. They stand
outside. They’re filled with
strife.
He holds the door as she walks in. The tears are
running down her chin.
She says “…I don’t love you anymore. That’s what
we have divorces for.”
I know I should go, but instead I wait. They go
inside with my own sweet mate.
Please
let him say some words just right. Help them rid their hearts of spite.
But while I think how hurt they are, the
headlights of still another car.
It’s James who has his parents too. Last Sunday
he talked about what he knew was true.
And now he’ll be leaving for Japan. He’s finally
making good his plan
To serve the world and share the truth; the
things he’s learned while yet a youth.
And one by one, my ward family dear, come to him
for words of cheer,
Or blessings that only he should give, as
worthily he tries to live.
I go back home. My heart can see that he belongs not just to me.
But I was blessed to have his love, by Father
who is up above.
Please let him lead me to Heaven’s door, by
learning how to give up more.
And look upon this wedding ring, that I will yet
reign as his queen.
-By Bill and Diane Nelson
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